Wednesday, September 2, 2015

mom bashing

we all know mom bashing is not a new topic and its one that has been discussed until we are blue in the face. moms that judge can just shove it. it's so rude. it's so unnecessary. and it's really just mean. i am a firm believer in that we are all doing the best we can. we are all making ends meet in one way or another. whether your ends meet with a surplus of money or they barely meet with pennies left to spare, you're doing the very best you can.

yesterday i posted on a moms page on Facebook. have i mentioned how much i hate Facebook? i never, i repeat never, post on those pages. as much as the admin try to keep it a happy, sweet, nonjudgemental place, that rarely happens. and it's exactly what happened the one time i wrote something to inform other moms. we spent two hours at a local water park about a week and a half ago. kids had fun blah blah blah. fast forward 3-4 days and our son begins have major symptoms that point to a possible e. coli infection. we spend a few hours at the ER, blood tests and poop cultures are done and fast forward a few more days and he's FINALLY feeling better. he was pooping 20+ times a day and he didn't eat for at least 5 days. it was hell. at the end of it all we figured out that he did in fact have some type of e. coli. the dr had been seeing this from local water parks and also salmonella from local watermelon. ew. and let's not forgot to mention the water park was disgusting. the water was cloudy and murky looking, there were too many kids to count without swim diapers, moms changing dirty diapers right on the pool deck….i could go on. so i decided i'd post our experience (only mentioning the dirty water) and share about the e. coli/salmonella cases locally. cue bashing bitchy moms. at least three moms felt it was necessary to remind me that e. coli lives basically anywhere. i'm not an idiot. that it was so rude of me to bash this wonderful family that owns the water park. that the family tried so hard to clean it up and make it a wonderful family place. wait. did i say the owners were responsible? wait. i did not. i'm pretty sure they're awesome. i bet they have, and continue to, made the park better than it was and a great place for family's. in fact, i looked them up on Facebook because these moms made me feel like total shit. and guess what?! they look great! they look kind and nice and like they probably run a great establishment. and you know, i spent many summers there growing up. i went on a lot of field trips there and i have great memories. but it just so happens that the one time we took our kids, it was disgusting. the people working paid zero attention to anyone going down the slides. wanna ride doubles? sure! wanna ride the mat like a damn skate board on your knees? yep! wanna let your kids wear regular exploding diapers? why not!

let me tell you, 3 other moms who decided to make me feel like shit, you had a positive experience there. that's so awesome. we did not. and that's ok. and you need to leave me alone about it. i did nothing but inform other moms so they could be aware. oh, but thank you for adding in at the very end that you know it's so hard for a mother to deal with her kids being sick, and hoping my son feels better soon. that made your bitchy mile long rip on me so much more acceptable. why can't you just say you hope my sons feels better? or better yet, don't say anything at all.

and that my friends, is why i hate social media and in particular, mom groups of Facebook. i think it's pretty obvious that i left the group immediately after.

on another note, i'm working on changing my blog over to Wordpress! yeah! thinking of changing the name to my business, The Modern Market…

Monday, August 31, 2015

this, that & the other

seriously. sometimes life is just lemons. lemon after lemon after lemon. and making lemonade with them is not really that easy. i'd prefer a vodka with my lemons but being that it's 2.15 pm, i think i'll have to wait.

lemons. health. we take it for granted. 100%. which is awful. m has been having headaches which we now think are migraines. her head ct came back clear (thank god) so now we move on to a neurologist. this has been going on for a few months and seeing her suffer is the. absolute. worst.

a few more lemons. d has been dealing with health issues of his own and man, that's almost even tougher because he's a baby. he doesn't talk. he can't tell me that his tummy hurts or whats wrong. he was on an RX for a sinus infection (hindsight is always 20/20. i should've said no thanks to the meds)which gave him the worst tummy aches. 8th day and i said no more. and then the symptoms of diarrhea got worse. like 20 times a day bad. bleeding bottom bad. long story short-we ended up in the ER because we thought maybe he ate a mushroom on the lawn. tests came back neg for that so then they thought maybe he had e coli. scary! he continued to get worse-like he didn't eat for 6 days-and then his poop test came back neg too. today is the first day he ate breakfast and a little lunch. his pooping machine bottom has slowed down and i hope he is on the up & up.

my poor babies!!!

que more lemons. we also decided to pull m out of preschool due to financial reasons. stab a fork in my heart. give it a little twist. then pull it out. i'm devastated. she loves school. we love her to love school. heck we love the school. for many reasons-one being my sanity. i wrote the email a bit ago and i had to save it. i couldn't push send. my tears started flowing and i just couldn't do it. maybe later. maybe tomorrow. maybe a pot of gold will fall out of the sky. or a $ tree will sprout in the back yard. school doesn't start until the 9th so i have a little time. right? ugh.

and now for my vodka lemonade :)

my favorite time of year is approaching and our summer pace of super duper busy has finally slowed. and it's perfect. we have our second annual camping trip planned for this weekend-sans kiddos-and we are so looking forward to it. we head up to the mountains at the end of the month. the modern market has been super wonderful for me. i have met lots of wonderful new people and made a little $. i actually am on the sub teaching list for this school year and to be honest, i'm looking forward to that too. a little break out of this place once or twice will be nice. and it will definitely help until that money tree grows. or the pot of gold falls.

Monday, June 29, 2015


hello again!

i need to get over these funks of not writing for such a long period of time. life has been great as usual around here. flying right on by. swim lessons. girls trip to montana. bought a trailer. went to camp natoma. gymnastics. duke says dada and uh oh. mila is writing her name. boss got a new job! <--- 10="" 5="" 60="" 7:45="" a="" activities="" all="" allow="" amazing.="" amp="" and="" at="" because="" but="" came="" come="" company="" dad="" days="" department.="" did="" different="" dream="" for="" four="" fri="" have="" he="" highlight="" him="" his="" home="" hour="" hours="" in="" incredibly="" is="" it="" job="" just="" middle="" missed="" night="" of="" off.="" our="" p="" possibly="" proud="" put="" quite="" right="" rough="" same="" sat="" seriously="" shifts="" so="" sometimes.="" still="" sun="" that="" the="" there="" time.="" to="" true.="" was="" we="" week.="" week="" weekend="" who="" will="" with="" work="" working="" year.="" years="" you="">
i took mila to camp natoma last weekend with my grandma. her great grandma. it was so fun. we slept on cots under the moon and stars. the angels sang us to sleep. the bugle woke us up. we ate camp food. we painted a lot of rocks. we went swimming. we got bit by bugs. a lot of bugs. but it was perfect. perfectly dirty. perfect memories to last a lifetime. i am so proud of my family. we have 5 generations going strong and it was just heartwarming for my grandma to take her great granddaughter somewhere she used to go back in the 40's.

we bought a trailer! woop! we are sharing it with my parents and cannot wait for our first adventure in a few weeks. mila named her bessy. like on cars. i offered up a handful of names and that's the one that struck a cord with her. so bessy she is. 

montana was a blast. such a great trip with my mom and aunt. its the most beautiful place i have ever been and i can't wait to go back! green and lush. rain in the afternoons. snow capped peaks. amazing. 

up next for the marks clan is the 4th of july parade and bbq. tahoe. the beach house. the fair. camping.  more water park trips, bike rides, dinners on the patio and marks memories 

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

fringe garland

paper garlands in new color ways
|ocean| |peoni| $8
fringe garlands $12
red, teal, lime, fuscia & yellow
|dot| garlands available in any color combo/length $12
|spring| banner two color ways $12

so behind

i am so behind in posting our 'lately'. seriously.

we went to the snow and got so lucky-it actually snowed while we were there! miracle. the slopes were closed due to lack of snow but we went sledding, made a snowman, ate lots of food, napped, ate some more food, drank and played in the snow even more. the kids loved it and so did i.

the kiddos got to hunt easter eggs 3, yes THREE, times this year. and when we were done i looked at Boss and said i'm never doing 3 again. one is enough. plenty. duke was crashing by 9 am, mila by 11 and when these kids crash, they crash hard. and it ain't pretty. but seeing family is wonderful. 

Thursday, April 2, 2015


Spring banner $15 with a coordinating Dot banner $12
Peoni color way garland $8
Ocean color way garland $8

New color ways up soon and also details on the fabric banners

Monday, March 30, 2015

exciting news!

guys! i've been working on starting my own business from home. i've been craving something for me. i've tried a few things. tested the waters. and finally found something that i love, enjoy and makes my heart happy. and that's the key people, making you're heart sing. and then sing that heart song from the highest point!

The Modern Market--Banners and Party Decor. you can find me on instagram @themodernmarket. i post new paper garlands and party decor daily, photos of custom orders and blow up your feed with beauty banners. sorry i'm not sorry. eventually this blog will become a place where you can find an inspiration for your party and make an order. for the locals-i'm hoping to sell wholesale in Paso Robles and possibly San Luis Obispo as well. i'll keep you updated on that.

paper garlands are made with heavy weight card stock paper using stencils and can be anything you want! They are perfect for your mantle,shelving or to hang on your chalk board. They are affordable so they can easily be changed with the seasons and holidays. Dot garlands, Letter garlands that say SPRING, OH BABY, anything you want, and range from $8 to $15.

fabric banners are made with iron on letters, any wording you choose. i usually iron the letters on a natural color fabric and add flags that coordinate to your event/theme. these will range from $40+ depending on the amount of lettering and fabric choice for coordinating flags. these banners are great for a baby shower and can then be added to the nursery, birthday parties, bridal showers and much more!

i will be posting photos soon!

Monday, February 23, 2015

He's 1!

this sweet little boy turned 1 this month! we had a cowboy themed birthday bash with family and friends to celebrate. that's a pretty good photo of the 4 of us considering we really felt like poop. mila was a day in to her second round of antibiotics for another double ear infection. and we would soon find out that duke had a double ear infection too. then boss got bronchitis. then mama got a sinus infection. we've been through the ringer this season with illness. we leave for the snow in a few days so i'm praying everyone is healthy for the trip. altitude and congestion/hurting ears are not a good combo. 

at 1 year, duke can:

play patty cake
points at everything
wave with both his hands
give loves
roll a ball to you
loves to hide toys and find them
play peek-a-boo
say dadadadada and mamammama
he loves his pacifier and blanky
he weighs 23 pounds and 12 ounces

duke is the biggest sweetheart. he loves to cuddle and laugh, play with his sister, bang on anything that will make a loud noise and be wherever you are. he takes two good naps a day and sleeps all night. and he loves to eat. anything and everything. well, except broccoli and avocado. he's not a fan of those. but put anything else in front of him and he will devour it. and then ask for more. it's kind of like if you give a dukers food, he will want more. and then probably more.

we love you to the moon dukers. 

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

the great debate

in recent weeks the great debate seems to be to vaccinate or not to vaccinate. well, more like "how can you selfish asses not vaccinate your kids?!" "how can you poison your babies and give them this junk that causes autism?!" that's more along the lines of what i see. and i have largely stayed away. i read the links shared on Facebook. i watch the news. we went to disneyland 2 weeks before this outbreak. TWO WEEKS. we have a 11 month old son at home who cannot be vaccinated for MMR until his first birthday. what if we had gone later? what if we had brought home this deadly illness to our sweet son?

the thought alone kills me inside. i worry about colds. i worry about green noses and ear infections and coughs. i worry about fender benders. cars driving too fast while we walk to the park. i worry about leaving her at preschool; not incredibly worry but a little piece of me has that thought (you know what thought) lingering. i worry about my sweet girls feelings being hurt. i worry about her falling from the play structure. i worry about duke bonking his head while learning to walk. i worry about his little teeth because he has irregular enamel. i worry about my kids getting cavities.

do you see my point? these are the normal worries of a mama and daddy. these are the day to day things that wrack my brain. and these thoughts were here before either of them came out of my belly. we should NOT have to worry about diseases that have once been basically eradicated. pardon my french, but what the fuck are you thinking when you choose not vaccinate your kids? what the fuck are you thinking when you have the thoughts that everyone else is vaccinated so your precious children are protected? what the fuck article did you read that told you autism is linked or directly caused by the MMR vaccine? what the fuck makes you think you are smarter and know more than your pediatrician?

because i bet you don't. and if you don't like or trust your pediatrician, then maybe you should find a new one.

i am pro vaccination. i am pro protecting my babies to the death of me. i will protect them and fight for them and worry for them every second of their lives.

//i am also a believer in everyone doing what is best for their family. i am pro bottle, pro boob. pro preschool, pro homeschool. pro working mom, pro stay at home mom. pro 1 kid, pro 5 kids. but this topic is not something i take lightly and i truly believe that the best thing is to vaccinate your children. the best way to protect them is to vaccinate them//


last night i read a post about what has been learned in 2014. what did i learn? my mind ran. it ran away with this question. in a million directions.

i learned:

1. that babies are made in lots of ways. in 2013 i experienced a loss that i didn't know would rock my world the way it did. we did IVF and i gave birth to a perfect baby boy in February. i learned that it doesn't matter how he got into my belly, he's here. and i'm forever grateful.

2. that loss can happen to anyone. i've been following a beautiful family that lost their 3 year old boy last may. i randomly came across her instagram account the day after the accident. i learned that my heart can and will break for people i don't even know. people whom i will never meet. but i ache for them.

3. that friends will come and friends will go. friends will walk into your life, bring presence to something you didn't know existed, and then just as easily leave. and even as they leave, they can bring awareness. i've actually learned this many times, for many years. and i'm sure it will keep being engrained for years to come. my children will learn this and i know it will be hard. it takes seasons of friendships, good and bad, to learn that the quality of the company you keep is much more important the quantity.

4. that my husband is amazing. seriously. this too, i already knew. but i will forever re-learn that he is my friend and he is here. forever. no matter what life throws at us, we will walk out the other side hand in hand.

5. that home is where you make it. we sold our very first house we made a home in July. it was so so hard for me to walk away. like crocodile tears. big time. i was pregnant with mila when we bought it. we brought both the kids home there. we had lists and lists and more lists of our dreams for the yard, master bathroom, an addition, new fencing. but i came to realize, that home is where your family is. living with my parents for 4 months was home. it is where i grew up. its where duke spent over half the life he's been living. it's where we slept on a mattress in the dining room. where mila potty trained. it was home.

6. that my hopes for closeness between family members is probably a dream i need to give up. i've wished and hoped for it. since before we were married. since before we had babies. since before they had babies. and after each of these milestones…those dreams were dashed away. i kept holding onto it, kept dreaming that maybe after the next thing, it would happen. the closeness would come. the memories would be made. but it didn't. and i truly don't think it ever will. and i have to learn to be ok with it.

7. that some days, a lot of days, i am a sucky mom. i cry. i struggle. we don't make it to the park. i don't hold up on what i said. the day gets away. she cries. i apologize a lot and say i love you profusely.  and then she get's a hot dog at costco and is happy again. (and mom eats a churro) i need them to know that i love them. good thing kids are really forgiving and strong.

8. that this world is harsh. it is beautiful and kind. but it is really ugly, too.

9. i can't wait to work again. i want to find something that's mine. i want to start some kind of business. i've dreamed of doing this for years but never have. i can say i've never had the time but that's an excuse. i can say we've not had the money, but that's a lie too.

there are a million other points i can list but i think these are the more important ones.