Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Circle of Moms

i am so lucky to be surrounded by so many wonderful moms. i have a few different circles of friends; in one of the groups we mainly stick to play dates with the kiddos and the other we do a girls night out once a month. i haven't been able to attend since the duke was born but i am really looking forward to our weekend away in May.

being a mom is tough. being a wife can be tough too. these are the two jobs that i have. to be a wonderful loving mom to my kids and be a fantastic wife to my husband. and i need support. we all need support. too often moms dig at other moms. judging. criticizing. snickering. its sickening. life is hard enough. we do not need to break each other down and make it harder. some cloth diaper. some don't. some breast feed. some don't. some breast feed for 3 years. some only 6 months. some moms lose the baby weight when they get home from the hospital. some lose it a year later. some mothers are single. some are married. some moms send their babies to day care. some don't. some moms stay home. some cannot.

it simply. does. not. matter.

all that matters is that you are doing what is RIGHT for YOUR family. that YOU and your FAMILY are HAPPY and thriving.

i pumped for m for 5 weeks and supplemented with formula. i nursed d for 2 weeks. too often, actually EVERY single time i am asked or it comes up that my children are bottle fed, i feel this unrelenting feeling to explain why. my head is screaming "i need to tell them it wasn't a choice!" "they have to know i went to an LC and it didn't work!" "they have to know i didn't give up!" (people have actually said to me "oh, so you gave up?") those last two words make me want to throw up. i did not give up. i tried. i was bleeding. scabbed. saying the F word with every suck. the pain made me curl my toes and cringe with tears. see, there i go again explaining why. i don't need to explain why i feed my babies the way i do. it works for our family. we are happy and thriving. period.

my point is, i am so lucky to have moms support my efforts as another mother. support me when i am crying and tired, support me when i am struggling, support me when life is peachy, support me and my family no matter what. i hope that i am encouraging to others and i hope that i give support to my mama friends like i have received from them.

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