see ya social media

i deleted my instagram account recently. and i'm not really sure how i feel about it. i miss it. my thumb automatically hits the photography icon on my phone and then heads for instagram app. but it's not there. i'll be honest, it happened about 30 times in the first few hours after i deleted it. seriously. that's code for #iamanaddict. ew. i was scrolling through at 3 am after rocking the boy. i was trolling while the kids napped. while i made dinner. in the car at a red light. it shouldn't be that way but i know it is for so many people. like, a lot.

it began to feel like a life competition. everyones pictures needed to be better than the post before. i found myself taking my phone places i wouldn't normally take it all because i thought maybe i'd take an instagram worthy photo. so. dumb. if someone didn't 'like' a picture, was it intentionally a stab? was the 'one-upper' really one-upping? or was she really just so damn sure that her life was perfect? am i the only one who feels this way?

i haven't used Facebook in years. the only reason i have an active account it for the mommy groups of friends i have. and thats the only way they invite to birthdays, playdates and party's. what happened to a phone call? text? email? snail mail? i get that is works for people. i get people love it and thinks it's the easier way to communicate. but what about the people who want to belong to these groups but hate social media? like me? i want to be at your play date! i want to go to your party! i love the friendship we have! but can you call me maybe?

there are for sure things i miss. i may even get it again. who knows. right now i am enjoying not knowing every single thing there is to know about everyone. because let's be honest; do we really care that you're at the park? or that you have a coffee? i'm going to guess not. and i totally think people don't care about our park adventures either. :)